It was two and a half hours of ear-splittingly wooden acting. My god, could there have been less character development? Yes, Jennifer Hudson rocked it in in the first half of the movie, but compared to the terrible performance of Jamie Foxx, and the bland blandness of Beyonce, of course she’d seem great. And yes, she totally nails "And I’m telling you," but there is so little development of her character’s relationship to Jamie Foxx’s Curtis that you’re left wondering why she’s so upset, and maybe she’s overreacting just a bit. You certainly don’t feel for her at all. But then in the second half, where the character is supposed to grow up and change (there’s even a song about it called "I’m changing"), she’s played exactly the same as the first half; loud and obnoxious.
And what about that other best supporting actor oscar nominee? Well, Eddie Murphy ain’t too bad, but he plays a self-destructing Jimmie Early like a rubber faced nutty professor. I was left wanting to see more of his character, not just camera shots panning away from objects that allude to his spiral downward into his own special drug nightmare. It relied way too much on cliched images of drug taking, and you know, I’m just a bit too sophisticated in my thinking to be satisfied with the "good person takes bad drugs and bad drugs make good person die" storyline. And he’s the only character to take drugs at all in the whole movie, which spans like 9 years of pop stardom. Give me a fucking break!
Maybe Deena was wacked out on quaaludes the whole time, which would explain why it takes her 9 freaking years to come to her senses. It would also explain the spaced-out way Beyonce played her. A knock out performance of "You’re not listening" was not enough to stop me hating her and wanting to reach into the movie screen to slap her and yell "wake up to yourself!"
The only character I liked at the end was Larell, who at least showed some progression over time in her character. It’s a pity that her story got so little screen time that I didn’t even bother to learn the actor’s name.
But for christ’s sake, they all end up friends at the end, which makes me think they all deserve to wind-up in thier own special hell where they’re forced to the damn movie over and over again, then write long essays on why people should find any of this clap-trap believable. And then do it all again. With no toilet breaks, and the largest watered down cokes you can get from the candy bar.
The film did leave me wondering two things;
1. Did anyone tell Jennifer Hudson that the best supporting actress oscar is cursed and that the winner rarely has another hit film? Marrisa Tomei anyone?
2. Did anyone else notice how much the dance hit "One Night Only" sounds like the Eurovision Song Contest winning entry "Diva" by Isreali transsexual Dana Internationale? I think its only a matter of minutes before Dan Murphy vomits up a mix of the two in the RHI at the next Mardi Gras party.