catch28

Maybe its just the left over chemicals and chronic lack of sleep, but it feels like something changed this weekend. Which is strange, cuz it seemed oddly subdued for a long weekend. Despite that there were still a plethora of those moments that you remember the next day and smile privately to yourself. It seems a shame to return to the mundanity of work tomorrow. Overall I think I’ve had a net increase in happiness over the weekend.

It’s hard, but I really wish well of people. Especially of people that I’ve suffered hurt from. I don’t hope that they fall down and life kicks them in the teeth, although sometimes I really wish I would want that. But deep down, underneath all the hurt and pain I still carry round, underneath all that, I wish them well. I hope they’re happy, and doing well, and contributing to the wellness of others. Cuz its not the same as it once was, what I have is remembered pain, the remembrance of what it was like, because, when I stop and take stock, its all going really well for me, and there’s no reason for me to wish ill of others. Everything has lead me to here, and i can’t say i’m unhappy. So I wish you all happiness, and I hope you’re doing well.

I’ve taken to walking to and from work. This is a recent development, but it’s been delightful so far. It only takes me ten extra minutes then getting the train, which is still ten minutes less then the time it used to take me to get to and from parramatta, and means that I don’t have to contend with packed morning city trains. It also mean much delightful seems-like-summer sunshine. The journey is mostly through parks, or tree lined streets near parks, which generally means the most dangerous thing I have to worry about are the cyclists who travel the same route that I do. But it’s lovely to see people out and about before and after work, mostly doing things other than traveling to or from work. It makes such a nice change from the blank commuting faces of public transport.

The good thing is that when I start my next new job in a few weeks, it’s only an extra two blocks away. 

To sum up.

Rushing to find an outfit. Big Parade. Lots’o'hotties. Walk to venue through huge crowd.

Lining up. Strange venue. Bizarrely incongruous crowd. Price gouged for beer and vodka.

Dancing on a step. Telling everyone about new job. Cementing new friendships. Ghetto Pussy.

Heading off. Cheap anonymous sex. Smelly. Shower. Not enough sleep. Not enough water.

Watching "Bearcub" on SBS. Sleep. Wake up. Phone doesn’t work. Email work. More sleep.

Bus to metro. Food, finally. Icky feeling from food. Still not enough water. Bus home. Reading. Reading. Reading.

Phone works. New sim. New company. Same number. Relief. Reading. Reading. Reading. Reading.

So that’s about where I am now. My head hurts from the lack of sleep, the lack of water, and the lack of remembering to wear my glasses. Been feeling a bit down, more the result of chemicals than any actual problems, so I know it’ll pass. So tomorrow I go back to work where I’ve been for only four weeks now, and I have to tell them I’m leaving for a better job, just as I’ve finally got the right computer access and can actually do the job they’ve spent the past four weeks training me for. Should be interesting.

Meanwhile, here is a pretty good article about the recent trend of people getting southern cross tattoos.

Also, I’ve noticed that since Bjork came over for the sydney festival, everytime i’ve gone out dancing, various remixes of her music have been heard on the dance floor. Like everytime, and not the same tracks just from her recent album, but different ones. Its been great. I get excited every time.